Суд над Бхагавад-гитой / Attempt to ban Bhagavad-gita
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/ #32412011-12-19 05:32In no time, I will quickly come to assist Your morning bathing and dressing and help adorn your delicate limbs with what I know to be Your favorite, exquisitely fashioned, dazzling sapphire-spangled golden ornaments. After massaging Your delightful figure with exceptionally fragrant seasonal oils and helping to blissfully shower You with an abundance of refreshing flower-scented water, I will remove Your thin white bathing garment, carefully pat You dry with a luxuriant, soft silk towel, and, at Shrimati Lalita Devi’s behest, gift You with new lavishly lacey undergarments lovingly made by me. I will then carefully dry and comb your long curly tresses and, in the dressing room, as my friends help to tie Your sari, I will, on the pretext of fastening Your jeweled ankle-bells, placing my head beneath Your skirt where no one can notice me secretly kissing the tips of Your sweet and delicate toes, offer my life’s breath a million times over in the dust of Your lotus feet. With a happy heart, I will loosely place above Your incomparably gorgeous, shapely buttocks, which captivate the unruly eyes of Your beloved Shyamasundara, a sweetly tinkling crystal-belled kinkini belt. As my priya-sakhis, upon my request, place sparkling toe-rings on Your toes, jeweled rings on Your fingers, and many thin, delicately chiming alternating gold and sapphire bracelets on Your wrists, I will adorn Your lovely, pure, plump breasts with heavenly, fragrant kunkuma and dexterously paint upon them varieties of mind-alluring pictures with kasturi musk. I will place around Your beautiful neck delightful pearl necklaces, a gunja-mala, a fine and most meritorious garland of tulasi leaves, and aromatic garlands of bela and campaka flowers, all simply to mesmerize the already enamored heart of beloved Shyama! I will intertwine Your beautiful serpent-like braid with supra-celestial bakula and jasmine strands bearing divine redolence known only to the transcendental forest of Vrindavana, and, with a smirky smile, I will intermittently place, wherever possible, the plumes of a peacock, knowing Your mind to be intently absorbed in happy thoughts of Shyama’s embrace. He Radhe! Knowing me to be well attuned to the inner ways of Your heart of hearts, You will tenderheartedly beam at me with the sweetest radiance. The sight of this will bring rippling waves of delightful moonbeam smiles to my priya- sakhis’ moon-like faces! When I hold before You a glistening sapphire-framed, highly polished golden mirror, You will see how I so perfectly decorated Your charmingly lovely, rosy- cheeked honey-face with an exquisite honey-pearl nose-ring, dangling dark-blue crystal earrings, and a kama-yantra-tilaka. Noticing Your elegant hair part, marked with crimson mind- alluring sindura pretentiously proclaiming Your faithfulness toward Your so-called husband, You will gently smile, becoming absorbed in the veiled ecstasy of paramour love. With fondness, You will favor how I faultlessly ornamented your crest with an effulgent sapphire-bejeweled candrika along with a nicely placed blue-sapphire mangtika, dangling to border Your curly hairline. You will see how I carefully painted indescribably enchanting gopi-dots around the playful cupid-bow eyebrows adorning Your limitlessly compassionate kajjala-lined eyes and perfectly placed a splendid musk-dot on Your sweet chin. All these will have magnificently embellished the inexhaustible loveliness of Your luxuriant, deep-crimson sari which redoubles Shyama’s insatiable passion to touch You. Thus beholding Your own boundless beauty in the mirror, You will all but swoon with a wish to be at once ravished by the lovelorn, reddish, lotus-petal eyes of Your dark honeybee-like lover whose supreme honey- love goddess is none other than my limitlessly lovable You! Kundavalli will then arrive with a message from Nandagrama. At that time I will solace You by encouraging You to comply with Mother Yashoda’s request that You come quickly to cook for Krishna. Hiding my smile when You openly rebuke me for enthusiastically supporting such a potentially scandalous affair within the earshot of Your superiors, I will offer my eternal dedication to the service of Your lotus feet again and again! He Radhike! When will my most merciful guru-rupa-sakhi, to whom I eternally owe my everything, invite me to accompany You and Your impassioned sakhis to the palatial home of Nanda Maharaja atop lofty Nand…shvara Hill? There, I will help You cook an incredibly sumptuous breakfast love-feast for the pleasure of Shyamasundara and His cowherd boyfriends. When Mother Yashoda greets us and requests the kinkaris to go to the bhoga-mandira to make necessary preparations for Your blissful cooking festival, I will build nicely blazing fires of first-class cedar wood and engage a few of my friends in helping to keep them ablaze. Moving like a fire brand, simultaneously cooking many varieties of tasty dishes, You, being too busy, will instruct me to quickly stir the pot of rich, creamy milk so it doesn’t burn. As I am stirring, stirring, and stirring, the milk will suddenly become thick, thicker, and thickest, upon which You will order me to quickly add the pre-measured ground cardamom and rock-candy powder, take everything off the stove, spread the contents to cool on a marble slab, and roll it all into nectarean, buttery burfi balls. I will all the while marvel as You mercifully include Your loving milkmaid in Your loving services to Your very own beloved Shyama! He Rdhe! After honey-faced Shyamasundara returns with His friends from milking the cows and is nicely bathed and dressed, He will blissfully sit amidst all the boys and eat the fabulously fragrant breakfast feast, praising the amazing variety of tasty delicacies. Everyone will float on the waves of ever- hungry Madhumangala’s unlimitedly humorous wit punctuated by the unabashed, intoxicating hasya-rasa of all the jovial cowherd boys. All the while, Shyama will search out the glowing golden treasure of Your fairest features through the kitchen window to offer You the nectar of His evocative sidelong glances. At that time I will do everything within my power to mitigate Your acute loving afflictions redoubled by the unfeasibility of intimately meeting with Him in the presence of His mothers and friends, let alone through the kitchen window. Afterwards, I will relish a little of the ambrosial remnants of His adharamrita-prasada personally given to me by Your own munificent hand. Being especially kind upon me, You will take me with You to the prearranged morning rendezvous with Your beloved Shyama within a cave on Nandishvara Hill. When, as I fan the two of You in the wake of Your luscious love play, will I shyly lower my smiling face upon hearing Him curiously ask You, “Who made those nectarean, buttery burfi balls?” To show special causeless mercy upon Your unworthy, insignificant milkmaid, You will silently tell about me to Your Krishna with the indications of Your cupid’s bow eyebrows as Your smiling eyes mercifully dance in my direction. In the late morning, Shyama will leave His father’s house for cow-herding, along with all of His happy, playful gopa- balakas. He, in various ways, will politely persuade His anxious parents to desist from following Him to the forest, just to give His bosom buddies the opportunity to freely frolic with Him to their hearts’ content. When will I, greatly anticipating the distresses of Your heart, witness with my own eyes the torment of the whole of Vraja as they tearfully return to their respective homes? I will weep to see You collapse into the arms of Your sakhis as they mercilessly carry You back to the gloom of Mother Jatila’s jailhouse. I will again and again hear You anxiously beg to be born as a bird so that You may freely fly from the confines of household imprisonment to the company of Your beloved Shyama. Again and again I will hear Your desperate plea to be reborn as a bamboo to get the opportunity to drink the nectar of His honey-moonbeam smiling kissy-lips by becoming His hand-held playful flute. Again and again You will praise the fortune of His shark-shaped earrings that unabashedly kiss His soft, sweetly shining cheeks. Repeatedly engulfed by intense feelings of separation, You will sardonically eulogize Giri Govardhana as hari-dasa-varya, knowing full well the incomparably superlative satisfaction Shyama feels by placing His delicate lotus feet upon the supremely rapturous mountain slopes of Your firm, amatively swollen breasts. Again and again You will beg to become like the river Yamuna, that You might swiftly flow unchecked to the ocean of Shyama’s unfathomable sweetness. You will fervently pray to become a breeze, rushing unhindered to whisk away the fragrance of His person. As You place Your newly made garland of forest flowers in the hands of the expert maidservant Tulasi to take to Your beloved, You will flood with a passion to become that very garland placed upon His broad, handsome sapphire chest. Plaintively pining but hardly solaced by the succor of Your sakhis, You will again and again languish by longing to become a madhavi creeper whose tender tendrils curl to enclasp the torso of a certain youthful Shyama tamala tree within a forest bower. When will we, with renewed enthusiasm and happy hearts, escape the looming prison walls of insufferable separation? On the pretext of accompanying You and Your sakhis to pick flowers for worship of the Sun-god, I will take You to a sanketa- kunja by the side of Your limitlessly lovely lake. Anxiously anticipating the nectar flood of Your fabulously festive midday pastimes, I will lovingly reflect upon Your amorous delusions as I witness You flirtatiously feigning indifference toward a tamala tree as we hasten along the forest path! In the suspense of Your lover’s imminent arrival, You will see Him everywhere, in all directions. Again and again, listlessly rising up from Your exquisitely ornamented flowerbed within the jewel-bedecked bower-house, You will impatiently gaze from the doorway down the forest path, and again and again You will return to sink in the ever-rising tide of Your desperation to see Him. When will I bathe Your two exquisitely beautiful lotus feet with an incessant flood of tears as You, experiencing a moment as if a millennium, anxiously apprehend the failure of Your now-much-overdue beloved Shyama’s arrival at our prearranged tryst? Repeatedly imploring You to patiently remain just a few moments longer, I will suddenly notice His rakishly smiling eyes winking at me through the window lattice of the kunja cottage. “Not so fast, buster! She’s our property! Don’t touch! We just took so much time and trouble to exquisitely dress and ornament Her and You want to ravage everything in a moment! Do You think You can so freely have our svamini just because You desire Her? I know You! If You want to realize Your wanton wishes, You’ll have to pay the price: unswerving loyalty to the service of the dust of Her limitlessly luscious lotus feet! Otherwise, go! Go to Shaibya’s friend Candravali! She’s easy! Her maidservants will eagerly make all the arrangements!” He Radhe! Boldly asserting the truth of our preeminent proprietary status, I will pull You behind smiling Lalita, who will stand as a formidable fortress to ensure the intensification of Your pleasure pastimes. Incorrigible Shyama, adopting a disdainful demeanor, will scornfully smile and flagrantly demand, “What did she say? Who is this insolent new kinkari anyway? Would she stand so valiantly if Kandarpa-raja forcibly waged war against her charming bodily beauty in a cave of Govardhana Hill? If he ever laid his hands on her, he would definitely teach her a dance or two!” At that instant, I will quickly hide my jubilantly blushing self behind my unlimitedly beautiful You to ensure the intensification of Your pleasure pastimes! He Radhike! When inconceivably clever Shyama, to everyone’s astonishment, suddenly eludes the comprehension of all, somehow penetrating our impervious phalanxes to bind You in the stronghold of His tight embrace, I will, on Your indication, stealthily spirit away with His mischievous flute! Shyama, being mesmerized by the intoxicating fragrance of Your person, will not at all understand what has happened. At that time, I will beseech that best descendant of the bamboos, “O best procuress of the wants of He who loosens the hair- braids of the innocent gopi girls of Vraja! O you, who, empowered by our svamini, force the formidable fortresses of their bodices to give way under the sway of their impassioned recollection of His indomitable handsomeness! O you, who, guilty of drinking the ambrosial nectar of the lusty lips of Radha’s supremely libertine lover boy, wish to escape the discontent of the deer-eyed gopis to whom that nectar actually belongs by returning the stolen property a thousandfold! O wanton vamsi, I know you! The next time Shyama sweetly presses your mouth to His bimba fruit lips, in His quest to conquer the pride of the kinkaris, please mercifully whisper into His ear how we are burning with the desire to attain Him in the service of our svamini!” I will then secretly slip the vamsi behind my back to Ananga Manjari who will in turn covertly consign it to the custody of Lalita Devi. He Radhe! You will then, by the strength of Your unblemished honor and reputation as a chaste housewife, manage to free Yourself after a little struggle. Glancing in all directions, You will sternly admonish all of the sakhis with Your tightly knitted eyebrows while earnestly endeavoring to retie the loosened sash about Your trembling hips. As entranced Shyama playfully approaches and dexterously catches the corner of Your sari, You will coyly smile while looking askance, frowning Your restless, cupid’s- bow-like eyebrows. Your soft, doe-like eyes will ambivalently rejoice and brim with tears. Your lusciously quivering bimba fruit lips will reveal Your intense inner joy. While strenuously struggling to resist the ambush of His brazenly adventurous fingers, You will outwardly reproach Your lover by lightly bopping Him on the head with the play lotus in Your delicate hand. “Don’t touch me! We’ve just bathed for our worship of the Sun-god! How will our offerings be suitable if we are sullied by a rapacious rake like You?” When will I be so privileged with this sight of Your sweetest kila-kincita and kuttamita moods, which profoundly delight Shyama with an indescribable happiness millions of times over and above the bliss He obtains from complete union? He Svamini Radhe! Just then, Vrinda Devi, smiling to see the fun, will intervene, saying to You both, “Hey You two rasika lovers! The abhijita-muhurta is quickly approaching! Best we not waste these auspicious moments with any unnecessary quarreling! If You want to soundly succeed in the consummation of King Cupid’s loving game plan, then quickly come with all of Your sakhis to see the beauty of the monsoon forest! This forest is complimented by the jubilant dancing of many peacocks and is specially arrayed with a myriad of swings. These swings were just now fabulously decorated for the pleasure of Your eyes and the happiness of Your hearts by my expert vana-devi maidservants!” At that time, You, being so petitioned, will relent and sweetly consent to happily traverse the dark monsoon-cloud- shaded forest path with Your arms about Your glorious dark monsoon-cloud-shaded lover. Eagerly intent upon climbing onto the best of all swings with His best of all transcendental sweethearts, Ghanashyama will fill our hearts with ever- expanding transcendental bliss as He fills Your sweet ears with the ambrosial nectar of His flirtatious joking words. When will I beam with pride as I shower Your splendidly rapturous dark and fair forms with fine, multi-colored, supremely fragrant flower petals as the sakhis begin to sing and push Your swing? Softly rumbling to congratulate You, the jubilant cloud friends of Krishna will momentarily sprinkle tiny rain droplets upon You to bring a cool exhilaration upon Your ecstatic swing festival! You and Your beloved, looking like incomparably pleasing lightning within a boundlessly beauteous monsoon cloud, will swing higher and higher as if to benevolently befriend the clouds and lightning in the sky! That delightful day will certainly come when I will personally witness the overpowering magnitude of Your matchless, divine generosity toward Your multitude of happy girlfriends. Blissfully sharing Your loving Shyama with Your most trusted confidantes, You will gradually make all of them intimately sit with Him on various forest-flower-decorated love- swings! All glories to Your ever-expanding transcendental passion for tenderly reciprocating the love of Your fully surrendered friends and maidservants! Vrinda will then come to You and secretly whisper something into Your ear. As I see a slightly mischievous smile appear on Your face, a blissful curiosity will flood my heart. He Radhe! Still dizzy from so much exuberant swinging, everyone will slowly wander with You along the forest path into a charming spring-flower-filled meadow. There sweetly singing birds will be warbling in ragas befitting the festival of spring. Jubilantly smiling and agitated by rippling waves of prema, the sakhis will spontaneously compose complimentary Krishna love- anthems in the vasanta-raga. Vrinda’s vana-devis will then present before You an amazing array of implements just suitable to facilitate Your forever famous holi pastimes with Your beloved Shyama. Before You will lay a large variety of delicate powder balls of fragrant kunkuma, candana, camphor, saffron, turmeric, and various flower pollens. There will also be excellent forest-flower-bedecked bows with quivered flower arrows. Broadly smiling, we will see exquisitely ornamented jewel syringes for spraying assorted scented fluids produced from aguru, musk, candana, mud, and juices pressed from varieties of highly fragrant flowers. All these substances will excitedly wait in splendid gold-and-sapphire water pots. Seeing all this, valorous Shyama will exclaim, “Aho! What is this? How is it that Madhava, the spring season, directly follows the monsoon season out of sequence? O Madhavi Radhe! I think it could only be because Your heart’s passion for conquering the kingdom of Madhava has emerged as this delightful springtime meadow replete with this formidable arsenal of superbly suggestive flower-power weaponry! Certainly there could be no explanation beyond this! Do all of Your wanton desires so aggressively appear as incontestable reality? O proud young lady with roguish eyes! Chivalrous warriors do not speak much but rather prove their prowess by courageous deeds! If You think Yourself heroic enough to withstand the onslaught of My flower bombs upon Your devastating beauty, then, armed with coquettish glances, stand and fight!” Glancing confidently from the corners of Your unconquerably gorgeous kajjala-lined eyes, You will boldly counter, “Bho bombastically boastful brahmacari! It appears that it is You who are doing all the superfluous chatter! We will see how You maintain Your equilibrium and sense control when You are totally demoralized and devastated by the indomitable bodily splendor of My sakhi soldiers and manjari bodyguards!” At that, we will all quickly change into thin white garments suitable for the occasion. Then Your holi love-assault will commence in earnest! He Radhe! When will I have the blessed opportunity to supply You with Your desired weaponry as You smilingly pelt Shyama’s unlimitedly handsome chest with powder balls of sindura and gulala? The sakhis will all simultaneously reciprocate Shyama’s continuous streams of colored juices by blissfully pulverizing Him from all directions with a barrage of colorful powder balls! Some very fortunate girls will immerse themselves in the nectar of transcendental musical accompaniment, exuberantly singing and playing varieties of stringed vinas such as kacchapi, vicitra, rudra, svara-mandalika, and tampura. Others will blissfully play on various kinds of flutes, shenais, and nagasimhas, creating an inestimable exhilaration. Still others, with amazing dexterity and potency, will zealously play different mridangas, pakawajas, damarus, and nagara drums in many varieties of rhythms, together with various bells, chimes, gongs, and karatalas, all periodically combining to make an incredibly tumultuous musical uproar! As multi-colored powders flying in all directions cloud the air with a dense, colorific confusion, triumphant Shyama, revolving with great alacrity like a blazing firebrand, will appear before each overwhelmed sakhi, besmearing one girl’s face, another’s breasts, and still another’s beautiful belly! Embracing one happy girl to His heart, catching another girl’s braids, holding another’s hands, drinking another’s nectarean kisses, and pinching yet another’s buttocks while biting her neck – in this way, Your svayam-rupa Gokulananda Shyamasundara will blissfully befriend each and every one of us by the influence of Your ever-resplendent, ever-victorious munificence! When the colorful clouds of ananda dissipate somewhat, Vrinda and Her vana-devis will approach to offer varieties of refreshing nectar drinks. Shyama will then take You by the hand to a private garden, and the selfless sakhis, intoxicated with the ecstasies of their own amorous afflictions, will stumble off into their various individual kunjas. My dear slender-waisted Radharani! I have heard from the lips of great saintly persons that Your honey-moon-faced rakish lover, Shyamasundara, has expanded His innumerable energies through His various agents to manifest all the spiritual and material worlds, intelligently accommodating the various desires and attitudes of unlimited varieties of living entities. Is that really so very wondrous? All the vibhutis of the entire cosmic creation are said to have sprung from a mere spark of His splendor! Am I supposed to be very much impressed? So what if daily He skillfully killed so many terrible raksasa demons, liberating them by merging them into His brahman effulgence! Was His bewildering of Lord Brahma by expanding into duplicate forms of thousands of cowherd boys and calves truly a display of His mystic opulence? Was His exhaustive dancing on the hooded heads of Kaliya-naga really very artistic or graceful? Perhaps if He at that time would have invited You and Your friends on board for rasa dancing, I would be somewhat appeased. I have heard of His having devoured devastating forest fires in His childhood, but what about the now-raging fires of our desires to see His sumptuous, supramundane, confidential prema-keli union with You? Some people might think His instructing the wives of the yajnika-brahmanas to return home to their husbands and patiently wait for some future opportunity a most noble and noteworthy display of kripa. Is it really so wonderful or important that He defied unduly puffed-up Indra-deva by easily holding up Govardhana Hill with just the single pinky of His left hand? Couldn’t He recognize any worthier mountains (mountain-like breasts) to uphold in this land of Vraja? I dare say He would not ably do the needful in this regard without the arduous exploits of all the fingers on both His hands! He may have been able to somehow lift a little mushroom like Giri Govardhana, but how, under the present circumstances, will He be able to lift the weighty vama- giri mountain of Your contrariness? I have heard that in His previous life as Raghupati Ramacandra He wrathfully killed Ravana, supposedly to give protection to Sit Devi. Soon after, however, He insensitively banished Her to the forest, giving Her unlimited distress merely for the fame and namesake of His Raghu dynasty. Were these deeds really so commendable or considerate? How glorious was His ungrateful arrest of Bali Maharaja or His confining him to the prison of his palace in the netherworlds? Bali had given to Him everything in the three words, including his own person, yet Krishna, as Vamanadeva, in return, only rewarded him with a mere post-dated position as an insignificant Indra. By that are we to think Him very high- minded and magnanimous? How heroic was His deliverance of the elephant Gajendra from the crocodile-jaws of all-devouring death? How victorious was He when dismantling the insignificant wasp Hiranyakashipu or when dealing a death blow upon the demon Hiranyaksa while delivering Mother Earth from the depths of the Garbhodaka ocean? Let Him now consider the crocodile of all-devouring time upon us, as if we have any more of this fleeting afternoon to waste! Let Him, upon a charming plush flowerbed within a secluded, ornately gilded kunja cottage, victoriously dismantle the hair-knot of Your loving anguish in a raging battle against Your tantalizing feigned belligerence! Let Him, dealing a death blow to the pride of the most liberal lovers in the three worlds, most mercifully deliver You from the fathomless depths of Your vast ocean of deepest, innermost premika distresses (desires) to please Him in every way! He Radhe! Only when I see Him carefully placing the tender arches of Your delicate lotus feet upon the contours of His blissfully shining cheeks, kissing them with His quivering coppery lips as streams of tears glide down from His half-closed all-alluring lotus eyes, will I consider Him to be even a little intelligent! He Priyeshvari! Shyama is known as bhusana- bhusanangam, the ornament of all ornaments. His ornaments are beautified by dint of their being worn by or associated with Him, the best of all ornaments. Yet, He alone, with or without ornaments, is not particularly beautiful. Only when He humbly begs to become Your faithful purusa-bhusana, to selflessly ornament (be beautified by) Your matchlessly elegant and splendorous lovely limbs, will He meritoriously attain the apex of magnificence! Only when I see Him totally overwhelmed and defeated by the intensity of Your lavishly luscious loving ecstasy and unconscious, fainted beneath Your bountiful bosom, will I consider Him to be at all heroic or skillful! All glories to Your solitary love play within the bumble-bee- bedecked, blossoming bowers of Vrindavana! He Svadhina- bhartrike Radhe! Only when I see Him afterwards, at Your beck and call, deliriously enraptured and amorously turbulent, unsuccessfully attempting, with uncontrollably trembling hand, to repaint the smudged kasturi pictures I previously painted on Your pleasingly plump and beautiful mind-bewitching breast, will I consider Him to be at all graceful or artistic! Only when I see Him, upon Your order begging to become the surrendered servant of Your unalloyed maidservants, taking the dust of their feet upon His head, will I know Him to be very opulent and fortunate! Such are the winsome ways of Your immaculately selfless, love-fascinations! I will attain the pinnacle of bliss upon witnessing Your peerless pride and joy as You lay Your own dearly beloved Shyamasundara to rest by the side of she who is dearer to You than Your own life’s breath, Your darling, most treasured, incomparably delicate younger sister, Shrimati Ananga Manjari. At that time, Rupa Manjari, Rati Manjari, Rasa Manjari, Mani Manjari, and Guna Manjari along with their associates will come to her supremely opulent Anangambuja Padma-mandira, eminently ornamenting the heart of Your love- saturated lake to lovingly serve her lotus feet. I offer my heart billions of times over in the dust of her lotus feet! When will I attain even a dust particle of her eternal loving service? In this way I will surely become especially dear to You. This is the most cherished aspiration of my heart! In reality, I have no other. Understanding this, You will always arrange what is best for me. That is my firm conviction. He Praneshvari! After some time, all of the sakhis will then gradually arrive from their various kunjas, having in their own ways satisfied the Lord of their honeyed hearts. While either shyly smiling or overtly scowling, endeavoring to cover the many symbolic inscriptions of Cupid upon their enchanting loveliness, they will delight You and beloved Shyama with an exchange of many joking words indirectly insinuating the depths of their intimacy with Him! Meanwhile, playfully preoccupied Shyama will suddenly remember . . . and reaching to check His cummerbund and looking here and there, He will discover the absence of His . . . “Whe . . . Where is My . . . When did My . . . Who . . . Who stole My flute?!” I will inwardly delight to see His nonplussed astonishment at that time. He Radhe! In a demanding mode, Shyama will search here and there, leaving no gopi unturned until He notices me fearfully glancing toward You for protection! “I . . . I . . . I didn’t take it! I swear to God, I didn’t!” “Well, who took it then?!” “O Shyamasundara! I’m just an insignificant maidservant who has no separate interest than the interest of my mistresses! Why do You think the peerless Housewives of Vraja would want to steal Your useless, old fault-filled flute anyway? We wouldn’t condescend to even look askance at Your flute! Even if we were sneak thieves, as You surmise, do You think there are no better things to steal in this forest than Your inconsiderate, degenerate, hypocritical and shameless ol’ flute? O ravager of innocent women! Rupa Manjari is right! It was most probably You who purposely stole Your own flute, just to have an excuse to give us all unlimited trouble! That’s precisely what I think too!” |
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---|---|
All time | 27 |
30 days | 27 |
Replacing newton with a new property factor
25 Created: 2024-10-22
Time period | Number of signatures |
---|---|
All time | 25 |
30 days | 25 |
Keep Castle Park Toilets in Colchester open!
216 Created: 2024-10-02
Time period | Number of signatures |
---|---|
All time | 216 |
30 days | 21 |
Request for 24/7 Security Camera Surveillance in Barking Riverside
20 Created: 2024-11-10
Time period | Number of signatures |
---|---|
All time | 20 |
30 days | 20 |
Stop the solar farm next to Barnsdale Gardens
3039 Created: 2022-08-02
Time period | Number of signatures |
---|---|
All time | 3039 |
30 days | 20 |
ULEZ FINES | Bishop of London Rt Hon Dame Sarah Mullally to her legal duty of enforcing the Confirmation of the Charters Act 1297 on Justices' & Mayor | ALL the Ancient Liberties of London Magna Carta
27 Created: 2024-10-13
Time period | Number of signatures |
---|---|
All time | 27 |
30 days | 18 |
Return to the UK's Christian Constitution
424 Created: 2024-08-14
Time period | Number of signatures |
---|---|
All time | 424 |
30 days | 17 |
Do Fridays Rehearsals on Thursday
16 Created: 2024-10-20
Time period | Number of signatures |
---|---|
All time | 16 |
30 days | 16 |
Bring back Rowntree's Cabana chocolate bar!
1181 Created: 2020-01-04
Time period | Number of signatures |
---|---|
All time | 1181 |
30 days | 15 |
Stop North Yorkshire council banning overnight campervan stopovers on Royal Albert Drive Scarborough
1918 Created: 2024-08-03
Time period | Number of signatures |
---|---|
All time | 1918 |
30 days | 15 |
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